The Boredom Killing Itinerary.

Posted: March 6, 2013 in Uncategorized


Biopsy tomorrow. The recovery time should be short, consisting only of an overnight stay in Swedish. But here is what I’m bringing with me to systematically fill every single empty moment of my hospital stay…

It’s not unlike preparing for Hurricane Sandy, folks!






No comment.


Did I earn these Cartier Sunglasses? Or did I call in favors from the mafia? Anybody’s guess, really.


Because without a glycerine drop or two of this timeless herb, green tea is just hot water that smells very Chinese.


He’s got big plans for the future that he can’t tell you about.


Because really, how many flattering pics does a person need in their lifetime ANYWAY?

If there’s any mercy to be found in the universe, I will be home by Thursday afternoon and will have managed to catch the much lauded production of La Boheme at The Seattle Opera on Friday. If I’ve still got it together enough, I’ll show up the day after that for Peter Nierman’s birthday party in Wallingford. There will a bevy of people I’m sure that I haven’t seen since middle school.

After that Saturday shindig, I’ve got NOTHING BOOKED. And so calendar obsessed lioness Joan Rivers has volunteered to have my breakdown for me. Again. That was, by the way, a very nice offer, Joan. There’s a reason they call you a “survivor” in this industry. And oh — I hope we’re even now.


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